my friend whitney recently reminded me how much i love the song, “love today” by Mika. if you don’t know it, it is fairly flamboyant tribute to, today. very peppy and wonderfully infectious! also a great one to move your booty to. and really, isn’t that all we’ve got, today?
another friend of mine lost a dear friend of hers today, at the young age of 27. it’s amazing how even hearing about something like this, immediately puts things in perspective and provokes gratitude. life is such a precious gift, but it is easy as humans to get sidetracked from praising it, to get sucked into routines, challenges and other things that distract us from the gift of the present. today, i am exceedingly grateful for my 35 years on the planet and i hope to have many many more. but, i have no idea what life has in store for me… so i do my best to dwell in the wonder of todayness.
i am including a poem today. i am writing poems lately, after a few years ‘off.’ i never in a million years expected to be a poet, let alone a poet with a blatant spiritual bent. the poetry i used to write and the poetry i have published in the past was a far cry from what is coming out of me today. it is a good thing, to me a poem is like a map of the soul. a snapshot of our current state of consciousness. the stuff i wrote back then was still rather dark and full of angst. i am grateful for it, it was a necessary stage and purging. and there is always more purging to do!
lately, however, i find myself purging mostly pure love! i find my poetry coming out almost in a voice that is not mine, a voice that is bigger than me. a voice that just comes out with ease and very little complaint! a voice that most often is overflowing with love, is present and full of praise. it makes my old personality a little uncomfortable! i could easily write a book called, ‘the death of kristin foster.’ i am very different in some ways than i once was. but the changes have been necessary, needed, and have created great improvement. this inspires me all the more to praise today, for it is a wonderful opportunity to change.
in india, it is thought that by simply changing one habit, you can completely alter your destiny. by doing one thing different, especially if it is something you never do, this action can have a powerful effect on your soul, your consciousness and the very life you experience. for me one thing i never do is get up before the sun rises in the morning. this is such a sacred time of day too, the world is silent, the world is yours. this is likely one of the next changes i’ll choose to make.
one choice i have made, about two months ago, was to switch to a vegan diet. after years of trying to creep up on the switch without much success, i decided to go ‘cold turkey’ (pun intended!) what a miraculous shift this has created in my life. i am very sensitive to energies, and well, there’s not a lot of good energy in dead meat. i would get sooo depressed every time i ate a meal! on the surface i would look forward to those tasty morsels and would want that turkey sandwich, would crave that bacon. but i would eat the bird or bacon and think… this is delicious… but whhhaaaa! it made me very very sad! there is no separation for me anymore, i see the animal, i see the unnecessary loss of life. especially now that i live in the country where turkeys are my neighbors! it is hard to think about them the same way. and it seems absurd to me now to celebrate thankgiving, with killing.
i have a deep compassion for animals and since they have no voices humans can understand, i feel happy to be a voice on their behalf. sure, being vegan is not for everyone, and i appreciate and respect all individual choices when it comes to diet. i do not feel holier than thou and i do not need everyone to ‘be like me.’ but i am happy to be a catalyst for contemplation in others. i am happy to ‘be the change i wish to see.’ i am happy.
the bottom line for me is, this one switch has dramatically altered the course of my life. i feel lighter, i feel happier and grateful for every meal. i feel amazed at how easy the switch has been. i feel excited at the challenge of thinking of new things to eat, it really stimulates creativity! i am a huge fan of food in general and i loooved meat, ate it my whole life. i never thought in a million years i would be able to give it up. but i have. and it is good, and i feel more my true self now than ever before. to me, it is not a choice made to restrict myself, it is not about diet and getting skinny. it is about loving something greater than myself , loving something more than my little self. it is about loving the earth and it’s creatures more than i love to satisfy my selfish little tastebuds. much to my surprise, i do not feel deprived, i feel expanded. i feel happy. and i feel after this feat, i could make many more changes. i feel i can do anything!
today, i wrote a little poem. i did not intend for it to be a ‘god poem’ 
, but this is what wanted to come out. who am i to say what my poems should be about. these days i just open myself and wait. and the words come out, and i honor them. i find it interesting that what came out hints at what i’ve felt all along. the truest appetite we have, the deepest appetite, is for love. and there is an endless supply for everyone. so let’s drink it up and dance in it and share it and give it freely! it will always come back to us. in truth, it Is us.
here is the poem:
GIFT OF GOD
satisfy your appetite
there is no lack of love
*
having slept, we now wake up
breathing in deep what we can hold
heart to the belly, today is just
*
today is calling…
so, in honor of today-loving Mika, and to unexpected ‘god poetry,’ i make my list of gratefulness in response to the question, what do you love about today? it is all we have. it is the greatest gift. make your list, it activates the best stuff in the universe!
What I Love About Today…
~the most delicious homemade chai tea. i chant a little indian prayer to it while it simmers and when it’s done, you can literally taste the love! it is very uplifting, very soul-soothing.
~peace and quiet and a day pregnant with possibility
~my sweet kitty sleeping in a perfect ball next to me as i type. my constant companion who has taught me so much about life!
~i am loved i am loved i am loved. i feel it everywhere, i see it everywhere. the best part of life is the people we are in relationship with. otherwise, i think experience would be very hollow.
~forgiveness. that it dissolves everything and brings you present.
~a hawk is soaring over the apple trees just outside my window.
~that even housecleaning is joyful when it is preparation to invite friends and loved ones into my home to share yummy food and thankfulness.
~cherished, long lost friends reemerging. i am grateful our paths have crossed again.
~how music instantly transports you.
~how much fun i am having as i work to finish the family cookbook in time for christmas. there are generations of love in this book. it is tangible!
~the sun is still shining so bright out even though it is supposed to be winter. this amazes me, i love it!
~that we are having ‘bangers and mash’ for dinner tonight! neil’s famous ‘confetti mash’ with red potatoes, parsley, carrot, white pepper and scallions. and we found insanely delicious vegan grain-based sausages, sage and apple, that are better than the real thing.
~that i can feel all my dreams actively coming true.
~i love that my cold is gone and i feel reinvigorated, very appreciative and full of energy again.
~that neil cleaned the kitchen up for us first thing this morning. aahhhh. music to a minimalist’s ears.
~my laundry is done and put away!
~that i choose movement now first thing in the morning instead of food straightaway, and how dramatically this enlivens my whole day.
~cold showers! yeah, another thing i thought i’d never do, but i’ll tell you, it re-sets your entire ‘electrical system’ and promotes waves of spontaneous bliss. try it!
~that today is just more time for loving, laughing, playing, creating and enjoying all there is.
~talking to my mom always makes me happy. her voice is so soothing. i am aware in the present how much i will miss her when eventually, she is gone. it may sound kind of morbid, but it is a powerful thought that helps me to appreciate my loved ones while they are still around.
~that i have everything i need, that no matter what i may worry about ‘not having,’ the truth is, if i reflect on my whole life, i have always been provided for. and i always will be provided for. worry is a waste of time. it is good to be aware of this. it changes everything.
~i love today because it is. because it is so vast. because it is whatever i wish it to be. this is the ultimate in creative freedom. this is the ultimate power. what will i make of it? the best!
okay, signing off for now. i am grateful to write this if someone is listening/reading. i am grateful if no one is but me! it is a form of prayer for me. it is praise. praise today, it is seed of all future dreams.
wishing everyone love and gut-wrenching laughter. peace.
