so, some days, i must admit, i get stumped on where to begin. how can i express my gratitude today? how can i express myself authentically when nothing is upfront, obvious, on the tip of my tongue, on the tip of my pen?
on these days i find a solution in using the phrase ‘thank you’ as a mantra. i say silently, out-loud, or through writing, thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you… until something i am authentically grateful for emerges.
in this way, though i may feel stumped and grumped initially, i can easily move past it, altering my my mood/attitude in the process. i never accept tiredness or lack of inspiration or bad mood as an excuse to not express gratitude, in fact, these are the times when i need gratitude the most!
so, tonight, here i am without a clue as to where to begin, but i am showing up and i am chanting thank you until the ‘reasons’ for my thank yous come into view.
in a way, this is a faith practice. thank you in advance shows faith that there is something to be thankful for even if you ain’t feelin’ it yet. so let’s chant…
thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you for solitude and peace and quiet. thank you for a day full of work and play and friendship and community and connection. thank you for homemade basil-mint pesto. thank you for the easy bake oven(s) i had as a kid. thank you for how much fun i had reading the first harry potter book in it’s entirety many years ago on thanksgiving day. thank you for my first vegan thanksgiving coming up soon. thank you for the book goodnight moon which is simple and magical.
thank you thank you thank you thank you for my heart. thank you for laughing until cheeks and belly are sore. thank you for new friends and old friends. thank you for space. thank you for the combination of chocolate and orange. thank you for indian goddesses. thank you for the fact that i looked in the mirror today and found myself thinking, ‘you look really pretty’ for the first time in a long time. thank you for mangoes.
thank you for the strange vision i had the other day during meditation where right smack in my ‘third eye’ which i don’t even know if i believe in, was a little jesus face attached to a buddha body in lotus position. it was a funny and interesting experience.
thank you for meditation. thank you for inner vision. thank you for the most beautiful world i have ever seen and it is not the one outside of me. thank you for love in all it’s forms. thank you for the feeling of relief. thank you for the ease of being. thank you for the pressure in my heart dissolving. thank you for the honest simplicity of a dog. thank you for lisa weil. thank you for all the children in my life. thank you for the wisdom of children. thank you for all that children have taught me: mostly, nowness and yesness and loveness.
thank you for the smile cracking my lips right now. thank you for staying up late. thank you for the feeling of driving a convertible on a sunny day with wonderful music playing and nowhere in particular to be. thank you for the beach and how it solves everything. thank you for transforming things, like butterflies. thank you for the poem, meeting at night by robert browning. thank you for candlelight and enigmatic things. thank you for the moon. thank you for all the birthday cake ice cream i ate in college. thank you for cheese at christmas. thank you for evergreens.
thank you for being you. thank you for loving me. thank you for expanding. thank you thank you thank you… for sweet dreams. and waking dreams. and dreams come true.
peace love & happiness 
goodnight.
